Verbally abusive boss has caused me so much stress that I have been on sick leave for 3 months

by Anonymous
(New York)

I am in NY. My boss is also the owner of the small company I have been working with for just about a year.

He has been verbally abusive to me including yelling at me (with a red face) in front of my co-workers.

He is sarcastic and insulting to me.

He treats me like a defendant rather than an employee. He acts like he is trying to "catch" me in a lie but I have never done anything to warrant this.

He often poses questions which are actually designed so that he can attack after I respond. In other words, there are no correct answers. For example "Do you think you should have done that?"...either way I respond will lead to him yelling at me in a raised voice.

He ridicules my ideas.

He discusses me with another employee.

He shows outright favoritism toward another employee and will buy her lunch and pay for her car repairs. (we suspect hanky panky)

I became very ill with intestinal issues that eventually required surgery. My doctors feel that my work situation greatly aggravated my medical issues. I have been on disability for 3 months.

A week after my disability started I went on a pre-scheduled vacation. He has refused to pay my vacation pay for that week. He verbally promised me 2 weeks vacation when I was hired and had already paid me for the first week. He now denies that he ever agreed to vacation time. I do have a witness to that promise.

I found out that he has already cleaned out my desk. It's completely cleared of all files, personal items, etc.

He told a business contact that he planned to get rid of me and told him that he doesn't trust me. I brought many business contacts to aid his business and now he is ruining my good name.

I am cleared to return to work next week but I am having severe anxiety attacks whenever I think about it.


I feel that he plans to fire me but I do not want to subject myself to another round of verbal abuse. I sent him a letter that said "I know you plan to terminate me and I accept the decision" and I included 2 pages of complaints about his behavior. He responded by sending an email that said "You are not terminated" and he is demanding that I report to his office next week. He said I must come alone and specifically said I cannot bring my husband. I had no plans to bring anyone but the guy is paranoid.

I am having trouble breathing right now at the very thought of going to his office. Do I have a case to get unemployment?


Hi Anonymous,

Yes probably so, but as I tell people all the time in your situation .. "what's going on extends beyond just a matter of whether you can get unemployment"

Your situation is one of workplace harassment. You need a lawyers help.

The fact that you are on disability now and under a doctor's care put's you into a protected class and you need to know this stuff so you can move forward without the anxiety this bully is causing you.

By the way, just because he told you that you should come alone really doesn't mean you need to come alone if you are fearful.

Some of the things you've mentioned aren't really wrong for an employer to do, so you need to focus on how this guy is discriminating against you and you need to learn how you or anybody for that matter can get an employer to BACK OFF .. or else.

Please let me know what you think of the information on the website above. I found the information valuable and informative and I'm just talking about the free email course about workplace rights .. which is all I've read, plus listening to a couple free podcasts.

Chris